Japanese Dining Etiquette: Do’s and Don’ts for Visitors

Japanese dining etiquette is easier than it looks. Say “itadakimasu” before you eat and “gochisousama deshita” after, never stick your chopsticks upright in rice or pass food from chopsticks to chopsticks, do not tip, and pay at the register rather than at the table in most casual places.

Nobody expects visitors to know every rule, and staff are usually very forgiving. Still, a few simple habits show respect and make meals more relaxed. This guide covers chopsticks, ordering, drinking, slurping, paying and the special rules for sushi, ramen shops, izakaya and traditional restaurants.

Before the Meal

• Wait to be seated. In most restaurants staff show you to a table. Tell them the number of people with your fingers if needed.
• Take off your shoes where there is a raised floor, tatami seating or a shoe rack at the entrance. Leave them neatly facing outward.
• Use the oshibori, the wet towel you receive, to clean your hands. Do not wipe your face with it in a formal setting.
• Say “itadakimasu” before eating. It is a short expression of thanks for the food.

Some popular restaurants have a ticket machine at the entrance. You buy a ticket first and hand it to the staff. Ramen and set meal shops often work this way.

Chopstick Rules You Should Know

Chopsticks carry the most important rules, because a few gestures are linked to funeral rituals.

• Do not stick chopsticks upright in rice. This resembles incense offerings at funerals.
• Do not pass food from chopsticks to chopsticks. This also recalls a funeral custom.
• Do not point with chopsticks or wave them around while talking.
• Do not stab food or drag plates towards you with your chopsticks.
• Rest them on the chopstick rest or across the edge of your plate when you pause.
• When sharing dishes, use the serving chopsticks if provided, or turn your own chopsticks around and use the back end.

I did not make many mistakes at the table myself, because my girlfriend at the time, who is now my wife, showed me everything. I also knew most of the rules already from my time in Seoul.

Is Slurping Rude in Japan?

No. Slurping noodles such as ramen, soba and udon is normal and even shows you are enjoying them. It also cools the hot noodles. You do not have to slurp if you are not comfortable with it, but you will not offend anyone. Lifting a small bowl of rice or soup close to your mouth is also normal.

Other noises are a different story. Blowing your nose at the table is considered impolite, so step outside or to the toilet.

Drinking Etiquette

• Wait for “kanpai”. In a group, nobody drinks until everyone has a drink and the toast is made.
• Pour for others, not for yourself. When someone pours for you, hold your glass with both hands.
• If you do not want more, leave your glass partly full.
• Nomihodai (all you can drink) plans are common at izakaya, usually with a time limit and the whole table joining.

The izakaya is the heart of Japanese drinking culture. My guide to standing bars in Shinjuku and the classic Omoide Yokocho are good starting points.

What surprised me at nomikai in Tokyo was how many people were sick the next day. Getting really drunk and then taking the day off was completely normal.

Sushi Etiquette

• It is fine to eat nigiri with your hands or chopsticks.
• Dip the fish side, not the rice, lightly into soy sauce.
• Do not mix a big lump of wasabi into the soy sauce at a high end counter. The chef often adds the right amount already.
• Eat each piece in one bite if you can.
• Pickled ginger is a palate cleanser between pieces, not a topping.

At conveyor belt sushi, take plates only when you will eat them, and do not put plates back on the belt. My ranking of Japan’s sushi chains shows the best places to start.

Ramen Shops, Izakaya and Formal Restaurants

Ramen shops

Ramen shops are fast and simple. Order, eat while the noodles are hot and leave when you finish, especially if there is a queue. Long conversations at the counter are not common.

Izakaya

Many izakaya charge a small table charge (otoshi or tsukidashi), which comes with a small appetiser you did not order. It is not a scam but a normal custom. Dishes are shared and ordered a few at a time.

Kaiseki and traditional restaurants

In formal places, dress smart casual, avoid strong perfume, keep your voice down and follow the pace of the courses. My kaiseki ryori guide explains the structure of the meal.

Eating at Convenience Stores, Trains and Food Stalls

Casual eating has its own unwritten rules. At convenience stores, staff will ask if you want your food heated and whether you need chopsticks. Many people eat outside the shop or take food home rather than eating while walking on busy streets. On the shinkansen, buying an ekiben (station bento) and eating at your seat is part of the experience. At festival stalls and food streets, it is normal to eat standing near the stall, then throw away rubbish in the bins provided, since public bins can be hard to find elsewhere. Bring a small bag for your rubbish.

Paying and Tipping

• Do not tip. Tipping is not part of Japanese culture and can cause confusion. Good service is included.
• Pay at the register near the exit in most casual restaurants. Bring the bill with you.
• Use the small tray for cash. Put the money on the tray rather than handing it directly to the staff.
• Splitting the bill is often possible at casual places, but not always at small restaurants. Groups often split the total evenly.
• Say “gochisousama deshita” as you leave. Staff will appreciate it.

Cards are widely accepted now, but some small places are still cash only. My guide to cash, cards and ATMs in Japan helps you prepare.

Other Things to Avoid

• Eating while walking on busy streets, though festivals and food streets are often an exception
• Leaving a lot of food on your plate, since wasting food is frowned upon
• Putting your elbows on the table in formal settings
• Talking loudly or making phone calls at the table
• Asking to change dishes heavily, as substitutions are not always possible

Frequently Asked Questions

Good manners in Japan are mostly about consideration for others. For more cultural tips, read my guide to Japan etiquette for tourists.